You know it's Lent

When your Saturday night cocktail is lemonade and cranberry juice. Cheers.

I'd better copyright this

Before some overpaid professional-fundraiser church bureaucrat type guy decides to use the last sentence as a slogan for the next diocesan financial appeal.

He lived long, he prospered, now may he rest in peace.

I plan to try this recipe soon

Soft pretzels, because...Lent. I'm late to the party, apparently. I'd never heard of this lady before, but she's been on EWTN and whatnot, so she's famous. Anyway, her recipe blog "AboutEating" looks good, and I enjoy her YouTube videos (and not just because she reminds me of Andrea Martin). She seems very practical and down to earth, which is what I need in the kitchen. I'm going to try this hummus version as well, since we all love the stuff. Traditional Lebanese recipe, according to Rita.

From our growing "They're gonna get to heaven before I do" file

Because he's using his talents, and how. His question choked me up, "What can you do?" Because I can do a lot. And so often, I don't. God forgive me.

If you can't have a built-in window seat

You should at least have a settee.

My sister (who was with me when I bought it last spring) asked me if I was enjoying it. When I get the chance to use it, I'll let her know. It is frequently occupied.

Relaxed Homeschooling

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"Classifieds" Photography 101

Dear people who hope to sell things online,

There is this icon on your phone/camera that says "rotate image". Please use it. Word: VERTIGO

To quote Mrs. Beazly: "Spoken in a vaguely European accent, reverentially hushed in awe of the photographic artistry on display here: They have taken the concept of 'right side up' and stripped it of its outmoded paradigms."

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Stupid question: How do you "counsel" someone who wants to chop off your head?

This is why these barbarians have been gaining ground. If only there was a cure (other than decapitation) for Delusional Liberal Leftyism.  I chuckle at the persistent use of the appellation "Norwegians" for the accused. Hint: their names are NOT Sven, Jorge and Nils. 

Neighbouring Denmark [...] has tried what it calls a soft approach, reintegrating foreign fighters through counselling and assistance in finding housing and work.

Maybe Marie Harf can get a job in Denmark if she loses her current situation. On a related note, war is horrible, but at this point, what's the alternative?  

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I know I have enough coffee mugs

But I want this. 

It also comes as an apron...

a tea towel...

and a mousepad.

What I did last Saturday

In the olden days, I would have said that I 'baked bread'. Now that I've watched the Food Network for nearly a year, I will have to say that I crafted some European style multi-grain artisanal loaves with a steam-enhanced extra-thick crispy crust and a medium-to-coarse crumb texture. I make bread like this every so often, because I get to craving a dense loaf that has lots of nutty chewy stuff in it (in this case, flax, chia and sunflower seeds). And it was a good way to use up some ancient grains (ie. quick-cooking oatmeal whose expiry date has long passed). It was eaten by the kids (and adults) during Saturday evening family movie night, with butter and honey, instead of the usual potato chips. (In my view, fresh homemade bread is not so very Lenten. Mea culpa.)

I had to take a second photo, because my current favourite coffee mug wanted to be in the picture. 

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Aprons, yes!

I am killing two birds with one stone here. Well, maybe three. They are: 1) getting a new apron; 2) teaching my girls to sew; and (most importantly) 3) spending more time with my daughters doing fun things. The harderst part (besides choosing fabric) is deciding on a pattern. I'm greatly encouraged by the sheer number of patterns* available. I don't think this would have been the case in the 70s and 80s. Like that IKEA store says in their brilliant marketing ploy, Long live the home!

I am totally loving how chic and glam they make these ladies look! I also like the frosted cake on the right. I have long held that you have not achieved womanhood until you own (and use) cake platters to serve frosted cakes to your loved ones. And kids, don't be alarmed by that weird umbilical thing that the blonde lady in the polka dot apron is holding up to her ear. It's a "telephone."

Image found at the delightful retro recipe site:

Hey, my mom used to make that!

*Moms, be forewarned: even on Amazon, you need to pre-screen when browsing apron styles (in other words, do not just sit down at the computer with your preteen and say, "Hey, let's shop for aprons online!"). Who knew there was such a thing as a pornographic apron? I suppose they are called "Aporns". God help us.
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It's like a disco party in your hand!

At least that's what I imagine the sales pitch to have been back in the day. Mrs. Beazly, whilst researching her latest short story, came across this on Etsy and forwarded it to me with all possible haste:

SALE 1960's Weiser Gold Flake Door Knob Set / Gold flake and acrylic knob set with mechanism / Door knob and lock hardware

$114.63 CAD

Only 1 available

Overview

• Vintage item from the 1960s
• Materials: acrylic, metal
• Feedback: 45 reviews
• Ships worldwide from Canada

OK, seriously???!!!!  The part that makes me laugh is not just the price, but the "Only 1 available." Shoppers of the world, if you want more than one, COME ON DOWN!! I've got these groovy monstrosities all over my house. Not only are the big ones on most interior doors, but I've got wee ping-pong-ball-sized versions on numerous closet doors.

I thought they were laughably hideous in 1998 when we bought our current home, and I still do. I've been trying, with limited success, to convince hubby to replace them. But now, good luck with that. Instead, he's probably going to invest in more home security. As of now, my bedroom hallway alone is worth $458.52!

Mr. Blurn once expressed an interest in these knobs. I assume he was being facetious, but if he was in earnest, they're all yours, buddy, but now it's gonna cost ya. 

(Oh, and I until proven wrong, I beg to differ over the Etsy seller's "1960s" dating of these. My house was built in 1975.)

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Compassion 101

Mrs. Pinkerton, surveying a conglomeration of dirty dishes on the counter top: "Wouldn't it be great to have a maid?"

Miss P #7 (age 10): "Yeah, but it wouldn't be great to be one."
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As I was saying... Procrastination

Not the forehead of the author, 

who was regrettably too sick to attend Ash Wednesday Mass

Oh my. There are lots of reasons why I haven't been blogging much... well, at all. But some things are just better kept inside, or in the confessional, or at the therapist's, at least for the time being. (Just kidding about the therapist... not that there's anything wrong with seeing one.) Actually, I was seeing a therapist for a while-- a physiotherapist, for my ruined knees (thanks, volleyball and badminton! I love you dearly, but you wreck people's joints), but I had to stop seeing him, because I didn't have time, due to a bunch of other challenges in my life, which I can't talk about (yet) because they involve other people, who have a right to privacy.

It's also hard to blog about funny stuff (or crow about vintage kitchen finds from Value Village) when people on the other side of the planet are being decapitated by Random Lone Wolf Mentally Ill Marginalized Underemployed Violent Extremists of No Particular Religion, simply for being Christian  Egyptian "citizens". I'm rambling.

We were talking about procrastination, which I am really horrible at combatting. That and laziness, which make for a pretty deadly combination, because it does things like prevent you from telling friends how much the friendship means/has meant to you, and then they die and things like that. Thank goodness for heaven (if I get there), where I may get another chance.

So here it is, the 4th day of Lent, and I'm only now getting around to thinking about what I should "do" to observe it.  I know you are not supposed to brag about your mortifications, but this is not really bragging so much as informing. And sometimes by telling other people what you are doing (or giving up), it helps or inspires them. Or not. But for starters, I have decided to give up Not Blogging for Lent. I hope that helps a bit with both the laziness and the procrastination.
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