Tuesday, January 15, 2013

On second thought

Maybe I'll soup up my crappy novel and make it even more pious and purple and start a whole new literary genre (if not publishing house!): the Catholic Ghetto Romance. (Mrs. Beazly, I rely on your photoshopping and cut 'n paste expertise to come up with my first few novel covers).

On third thought, forget it. In a world where such a thing as Amish romance fiction actually exists, we are well and truly beyond satire. (Book titles below listed in order of the progression of the romance.)

[Fifth in series cover not available: "The Canoodling"]


  1. All that is good and wonderful about literature forgive me but I find myself intrigued (is it really horrible? and can it really be That horrible??) It's like watching a crystal goblet fall...

  2. Gotta tell you, there are lots of Amish around here, and when they shop at the local Aldi's, I try to glance--discreetly--under the bonnets hoping to find a woman who looks like any of the Amish Barbies depicted on these book covers. Hasn't happened yet.

    Please do publish the Catholic ghetto romance. Although you know there are a few of these out there already. But surely you can take this genre to a new level. I suggest replacing the bonnet with a lace mantilla when Mrs. Beazley photoshops one of the bookcovers. Change the jumper from black to blue denim. I can't wait to see this and to read the novel. Give us a rough plot outline and then hold a contest for us to choose the title.

    1. You are SO lucky that I was not drinking coffee (or anything else) when I read this, because it would have come out my nose at "lace mantilla" and you would owe me a new Mac.
      The book contest sounds fun though. Patrick Madrid's famous Traditional Catholic Pick-Up lines come to mind...


      publisher: A Votive Candle Romance
      Tagline: "She wasn't late for Bible Study; she was on..."
      Novel title: "Homeschool Time"

  3. Excellent idea for a series! You will have plenty of readers: one of the most highly used sections in my library is "Inspirational Fiction" which is primarily romance novels about long-skirted women.