How to smell like booze, without touching a drop

Wear this.

Secret "Scent Expressions" vanilla. I don't usually buy scented products of this nature, but Mr. P and I were stranded overnight (by a snowstorm) some weeks back and I had to dash into the pharmacy and get some supplies. I couldn't find my regular stuff, so I thought, "You know, I really like vanilla." Bad move. To me, it smells exactly like a whiskey-based liqueur (such as Bailey's Irish Cream). Not really the scent you want to exude, say, at work or school, at a job interview, in the grocery lineup (especially if you have several small children screaming in your cart, and people come up to you and say, "Are they all yours?"), or (best of all) in the confessional. Father will say, "And is there anything else you'd like to confess?" And you may not know what he's getting at.

So if you ever plan on purchasing this product, you can't say you weren't warned.
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